Folly...

   A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up
   anger. The tongue of the wise commends knowledge, but the
   mouth of the fool gushes folly.

   Proverbs 15:1-2

I find it interesting that I got these verses in my email this morning after the night I had with my wife.  Without giving too much information, our communication wasn't the best.  I've noticed a lot recently how much our words can affect other people.  I'm not sure how much of a struggle this is for other people, but I have to consciously think about almost everything that comes out of my mouth.  When I don't think before I speak, I say things that are mean or hurtful and that's not the way I want to communicate with other people.  

 

After reading the verses above, I decided to look up "folly" on dictionary.com and here are the definitions it gives:

fol·ly

1. the state or quality of being foolish; lack of understanding or sense.

2. a foolish action, practice, idea, etc.; absurdity: the folly of performing without a rehearsal.

3. a costly and foolish undertaking; unwise investment or expenditure.

4. Architecture . a whimsical or extravagant structure built to serve as a conversation piece, lend interest to a view, commemorate a person or event, etc.: found especially in England in the 18th century.

5. follies, a theatrical revue.

 

I feel almost like the first 3 definitions are like a process that we go through as people. 

 

The first definition says "the state or quality of being foolish" which to me could mean we're in a foolish/uncontrolled/non-thinking state of mind...were kind of just there in the moment and unprepared for REAL conversation with another person. 

 

The second definition says, "a foolish action, practice..." then the example sentence says "the folly of performing without a rehearsal."  That basically says to me...speaking without thinking about what you're saying or how your saying it.  Imagine going to a play that had never been rehearsed or practiced...the actors would be all over the place and the dialogue/theme probably wouldn't make much sense to the audience.

 

The third definition says, "a costly and foolish undertaking; unwise investment or expenditure."  To me that sounds like the result of someone not thinking before they speak.  We don't think before we speak and we either say something stupid, insensitive, mean, or just simply sound hateful or not nice...and we hurt the feelings of our friends, spouses, co-workers, and we may never really mean to, but it happens.

 

So I've been thinking of ways to combat being the latter part of the Proverbs15:1-2 verses above...I don't want the "mouth of the fool gushes folly" part to describe me...I'm sure you don't either.  I think we have to pray for God's help.  I think  we have to make smore of a concious effort to think before we speak.  Ask ourselves where are words are coming from?  Are we using words that are going to benefit the conversation we are in?  Are our words going to build the person, or people, up we are conversing with, or are our words going to bring them down or belittle them or their points? 

 

The following verses I think could be fresh reminders for those of us that struggle with communication...

 

2 Corinthians 10:5
We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.

 

Ephesians 4:15
Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will grow to become in every respect the mature body of him who is the head, that is, Christ.

1 Corinthians 13:1
If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal.
 

Ephesians 4:29
Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.

 

I hope the above verses help and if you know of any more feel free to post them in the comments.  I want to communicate well and in a loving way with everyone...especially my wife...so hopefully, with God's help and guidance, I'll be able to improve in this area!  Let's start communicating better :)

 

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God Bless

Jon Abercrombie
holybloggers.blogspot.com

A Sacred Sorrow...

I was reading this article (out of the InTouch Magazine produced by Charles Stanley and his staff at InTouch.org) Sunday night before our night service at church and found it very interesting...then around 45mins later, our pastor actually spoke on how Mary stuck with Jesus throughout His crucifixion.  Awesome how God confirms what He is teaching/trying to show us.  Check out the article if you have time...hope you enjoy!

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A Sacred Sorrow

Bearing witness to the crucified life

By Ginger Garrett

My friend was dying. A young, vibrant believer with small children at home and a devoted husband, she was suffering intensely from the cancer. A small tribe of friends banded together, determined to remain by her side throughout the struggle. We couldn't stop her suffering, or prevent death, but we could offer ourselves as faithful companions on a dark and dreadful journey.

At times, all of us will be called to act as witnesses to the suffering of another. We will be unable to affect the outcome physically. Words will fail us. Prayer will seem futile. And yet, the act of bearing witness to someone else's trials is a sacred sorrow that offers an astounding glimpse of eternal joy.

Few events in the Bible teach us this lesson as well as the story of the women who followed Jesus to His death on the cross. The group included His mother Mary, Mary Magdalene, and others—most likely widows, family, friends, and women who had been healed by the Lord. Though lacking the social and legal privileges of men, they were willing to do what many of the men were not. They were willing to stay with Jesus throughout His travail.

Before the crucifixion, the Lord prepared His disciples by using a distinctly feminine analogy: "Whenever a woman is in labor shehas pain, because her hour has come; but when she gives birth to the child, she no longer remembers the anguish because of the joy that a child has been born into the world. Therefore you too have grief now; but I will see you again, and your heart will rejoice, and no one will take your joy away from you" (John 16:21-22). Jesus was promising an end to the suffering—pain and anguish followed by a joy so great it overwhelms the former sorrow. The women quite possibly heard Him teaching, too, and would have understood what their role was to be.

Just as Jesus predicted, the "birth pains" came in a cascade of terrible events. The women were helpless as the Master was arrested, put on trial, and publicly condemned. When the soldiers stripped, beat, and flogged Him, the women surely responded to every drop of His blood with a dozen tears of their own.

Yet they did not leave, even when the disciples began to fall away. Instead, as Jesus carried His cross through the streets, they followed Him still. Scripture tells us that "following Him was a large crowd of the people, and of women who were mourning and lamenting Him" (Luke 23:27). To mourn was to beat the chest in a public display of grief. To lament was to wail loudly, or to sing a funeral song. The women following Jesus grieved in every way, yet He marched on, carrying His cross. The women had once lived without hope of ever being set free from their oppressive culture and personal sins. Now they howled in helpless protest that a fallen world might take away their one hope, their beloved Savior.

Then came the bitter disaster: the Savior who'd healed them, given them back their dead, fed them, and blessed their children so tenderly—this Lamb was crucified. Yet they did not leave. "And all His acquaintances and the women who accompanied Him from Galilee were standing at a distance, seeing these things" (Luke 23:49).

As the hours stretched on, many deserted him, and the crowds thinned, yet some women chose to move even closer: "But standing by the cross of Jesus were His mother, and His mother's sister, Mary the wife of Clopas, and Mary Magdalene" (John 19:25). Jesus' suffering was so extreme that most were repelled, yet a few chose to draw nearer still.

Perhaps Jesus was saddened to look down from the cross and note the few remaining friends. It's often said that you don't know who your friends are until trouble hits. Jesus experienced the reality of our earthly suffering: most friends and family will choose to run away. We can never predict who will choose to stay.

The women at the foot of the cross offer us a glimpse of the purpose, power, and promise of bearing witness. First, we are commanded to support those undergoing painful trials: "Bear one another's burdens, and thereby fulfill the law of Christ" (Gal. 6:2). Like many acts of obedience, it won't always be easy. We may wrestle with pride, fear, and frustration over God's timing. We will also be repeatedly forced to confront the question of humanity throughout the ages: Can God be trusted, even when it hurts?

But if we are willing, bearing one another's burdens holds great power to win influence for the kingdom of God. In the book of Philippians, Paul wrote of the "surpassing value" of sharing in "the fellowship of His sufferings" (Phil. 3:8, 10). So often we think of fellowship as refreshing times spent with happy believers. But oh, the unbreakable bonds that are forged when we walk with the wounded. If we are unafraid to face the worst of earthly sorrows, our testimony will have credibility when we speak of a heavenly hope.

In this world full of false saviors, credibility among the suffering is precious. Jesus said, "Greater love has no one than this, that one lay down his life for his friends" (John 15:13). Demonstrating the greatest love possible is one proof that we know the Source of this love. If you mirror Christ's actions, others may be more inclined to believe your claim to know Him personally. Behavior is modeled from what we know best, so when we behave as He did, we offer proof of our relationship with Him.

And just as Jesus predicted, the women who had experienced the worst of human sorrows would now have triumphant, eternal joy.

Earthly life may hold pain and anguish, abandonment and few faithful friends, but when it is over, joy will be ours—one so great that all sorrow is forgotten forever. Perhaps that is why we must get new bodies at the resurrection; our mortal bodies cannot contain such intense joy. As my friend lost her battle with cancer, those close to her were comforted to know that the best was yet to come for her, and for us all as believers.

Two thousand years ago, Jesus looked down from the cross to find that only a handful of friends remained. Today He is on His throne, faithful to watch over those who struggle. May we be faithful to walk with them as well.

Copyright 2012 In Touch Ministries, Inc. All rights reserved. www.intouch.org. In Touch grants permission to print for personal use only.

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God Bless

Jon Abercrombie
holybloggers.blogspot.com

Online "Book Club" Idea

I've had this idea about kinda starting an "online book club" type thing for a while now and figured I might as well share it.  In an effort to grow in/with my family (mostly the men in my family) I'm starting a book reading thing with my bro and pops and I am extending it to my blog...hopefully by including it on my blog, it will help hold me accountable and provide more ways for folks to discuss the book openly together..

 

Basically, my idea is to pick a book and read through it (roughly on the same timeline as everyone else) and using the blog, after I read a chapter, I'll post a synopsis and key points that I liked in that chapter, then allow others reading the book to (hopefully) post comments on their thoughts about that chapter.  I don't really want it to be structured where we have to read the first chapter by this date...I know everyone is busy and we all have different reading styles, so I'm not expecting it to be like homework...I want us to enjoy what we read and hopefully enjoy communicating what we learn, like, and/or dislike about the books.

 

This could totally bomb and no one will do it but me, but I think it is a cool idea that we could have a bunch of people reading the same book and then talking about it and how it relates to our lives or makes us think. 

 

All that being said, the first book is going to be Wide Awake by Erwin Raphael McManus (Amazon link with description) if you are interested...you can get it for $0.75 on half.com (+$3-4 for s&h link to page with Wide Awake on it for sale).

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God Bless

Jon Abercrombie
holybloggers.blogspot.com

Jon Acuff - Blog: People ignoring your dream? Awesome.

I read this post from Jon Acuff's Blog (and  an excerpt from my book Quitter) and thought it pretty much nailed what I have gone through as a blogger.  I wouldn't say blogging or writing professionally is my dream, but I do enjoy doing it and like any one else doing anything, you want your work to be seen and appreciated.  We definitely tend to mix our value in with the things we do...blogging is no different...many times I thought about cutting ties with ol Holy Bloggers simply because people weren't reading...and for a while I did stop posting...but I feel like this blog provides an arena for me to write about what God is showing and teaching me in my life.  If you choose to read this blog regularly, I appreciate you taking the time to do so! 
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Jon Acuff - Blog

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People ignoring your dream? Awesome. Posted: 04 Apr 2012 04:00 AM PDT For about a year before I started www.stuffchristianslike.net, I wrote a blog called Prodigal Jon. On my best day, two hundred people showed up and read what I wrote. On the average day, fifty people did. And a lot of those fifty people shared my last name. And were my mom. It was a quiet blog that, by blogging terms, wasn't very successful. If the goal of a blog is to grow an active, vocal community, then I was failing. Almost no one read it. And, even though I worked as hard as I could, it stayed roughly the same size. Day after day, month after month, I wrote Prodigal Jon. At the time, I felt like it wasn't going anywhere. I felt confused that so few people knew about it. I didn't see the point of writing to a handful of people on a consistent basis. That didn't make a whole lot of sense to me. But looking back on it, I needed that year. I needed the gift so few of us want but most of us need: the gift of invisibility. When you start something new, you want it to be successful right away. You want it to grow and get visible quickly. But there are some problems inherent to visibility. For starters, it's harder to take risks when people are watching you. It's harder to experiment when many eyeballs are tracking with you. It's harder to remain innovative when people have a specific expectation about who you are and what you do. The temptation to play it safe increases with each new fan or follower. Suddenly, instead of just doing what you love to do, other people are speaking into it with their hopes and plans. People tend to get safe and small in the spotlight. Your honesty also seems inversely proportionate to the size of your audience. Your willingness to be open shrinks in proportion to the growth of your crowd. It's not that difficult to be transparent to a group of ten readers. You realize that if you say something they don't like and they all stop supporting your dream, you can always start over. But if you've got four thousand people buying your product or using the services of your company, you now have four thousand reasons to keep things polished and pretty. Let's think about this whole honesty thing. It's the reverse of every Jerry Bruckheimer "Guy goes on a revenge streak movie." The tagline is usually something like, "The most dangerous man in the world is the man who has nothing to lose." The opposite of that, especially if you get some attention and visibility for your dream early on is, "The safest man in the world is the man who has everything to lose." It's true. One of the costs of notoriety is safety. Anonymity allows you to make big, gross mistakes without everyone watching. Anonymity is the best creative lab because you've got nothing to lose. Anything is possible. Anything is on the table. There are no expectations to miss, no fans to disappoint, no follow up fears. That's why famous writers are so terrified to follow up on success. I've heard mega best-selling authors confess that, when they sat down to try to write their next book, they were overwhelmed with fear. The expectations, the hope that they would recreate the success of that first book, that they would catch lightning in a bottle again, were so high that these authors felt crippled. You don't have that issue if you are invisible and anonymous. You're free. As long as you are invisible, you have what Justin Bieber and Martha Stewart and LeBron James will never have again—the freedom to make mistakes on your own. Visibility can be great, and maybe one day you'll have it if you don't already. But don't miss the wonderful gifts invisibility is trying to give you right now because you're so busy trying to be visible. (This is an excerpt from my book Quitter. If you're not living your dream job right now, you might want to check out the rest of the book.) Question: Have you ever felt discouraged about how long it's taking your dream to come true?

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God Bless

Jon Abercrombie
holybloggers.blogspot.com